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“When a flower doesn’t bloom, you fix the environment in which it grows, not the flower.” ~Alexander Den Heijer  He was intelligent, well-read, and kind. A good father, careful about protecting his kids from meeting partners too soon. A man with a life philosophy, who kept his word, who told the truth with an honesty that…

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.” ~Viktor Frankl A few weeks ago, I moved to a new city for a new job, leaving behind a quiet hill town where I had built five years of friendships, routines, and a version of myself I…

“The fuel of life is feeling. If we’re not filled up in childhood, we must fill ourselves as adults.” ~Jonice Webb, author of Running on Empty I was nine years old the first time I taught myself how to disconnect completely from my emotions. It started with a secret I wasn’t supposed to tell, a…

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” ~Rumi The room didn’t change when she left. The chair was where it had always been, angled toward the window the way she liked it. What changed was that I could finally see the shape of the thing I’d been leaning on, now that it…

“Every moment, every challenge, every inner reaction is here to show you exactly what you need to let go of in order to be free.” ~Michael A. Singer The other day, while standing in the kitchen, I grabbed my phone to send a text, but it didn’t recognize my face. Suddenly, every time I wanted…

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” ~Rumi The first winter, I learned to lie cheerfully. “How are you settling in?” someone would ask, and I would smile and say, “Really well, thank you.” That was the most fluent English I spoke all day. I had left a warm, loud, crowded life…

“Taking care of yourself doesn’t mean me first; it means me too.” ~L.R. Knost We live in a society that celebrates pushing through; burnout is often worn as a badge of honor, and many job descriptions state bluntly, “Must be able to perform well under pressure and thrive in a fast-paced environment.” I’m very well aware…

“Trauma creates change you don’t choose. Healing is about creating change you do choose.” ~Michelle Rosenthal” Today I am sitting in my favorite café in Venice Mall. I got my favorite seat, the one near the water. I have spent countless hours here. I have cried here. Journaled here. Drawn here. Consoled myself here. There…

“You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” ~Mark Twain It started with a clogged kitchen drain. Or maybe the drain was where everything else I’d been carrying finally surfaced. Regardless, the water wasn’t moving. It was so bad that some of it backed up in the bathroom sink. Baking…

“To tie your worth to achievements is a recipe for suffering.” ~Brad Bizjack Children don’t just learn mathematics, science, and languages in school. They also learn what success feels like, what failure means, who they believe they are, and sometimes, whether they think they belong. When I was in primary school, my school introduced academic…